A Dying Man's Regrets

     The word quickly spread of the terminal illness of a man well known in the community. A young man, maybe a bit more curious than most, just had to ask the dying man. "How does it feel to know you are dying?'

     "Do you mean would I have rather died suddenly like my father? Not knowing, gone in an instant. Or am I glad I am dying knowing the day is just over the horizon? I can't answer that."

     "Well" the young man continued with another question. "Are you satisfied with the man you are?"

     "I am who I am because of the choices I have made. The things I have seen and felt. The actions I have taken. I am who I am." the man said emotionless.

     "Then you have no regrets?" With this question the young man saw tears well up in the dying man's eyes.

    There was a pause. Then the dying man now with tears visibly slipping from his eyes and rolling down his cheeks, looked toward the ground and replied.

    " I regret ever having witnessed a tear of sorrow.

     I regret every single tear I ever brought to another.

    

     I regret any word I have ever spoken to another in anger.

     I regret any pain I ever inflicted on another.

     I regret anyone in need I ever passed by, without stopping to see if I could help.

     I regret living in a world where immorality has become an acceptable way of life.

     I regret living in a world where people are proud to encourage hate in others, against those they accuse of  encouraging hate.    

     I regret living in a world where people think only of themselves and what is in it for them rather than what is good for all.

     I  regret living in a world where religion has become a bad word.

     I regret living in a world where most churches have stopped loving, helping and encouraging those down and out. In a world where it is more common for them to spew hate out of their mouths, judging and calling the unfortunate and disabled lazy and good for nothing. Not bothering to ask the situation and not caring.  

     I regret living in a world where many churches have become exclusive clubs where sinners and homeless need not enter. Where in many cases the preacher is the highest paid person in the room and begs for more.

     I regret living in a world of  my god is better than your god and I'll kill you to prove it.

     I regret living in a world where the government is willing to lie, trick and bribe to get a bill past that harms the people it was put in place to protect.

     I regret living in a world where people are judged or excused due to race, religion or color of their skin.

     I regret living in a world where it is good economics to start a war.

     I regret not having made an effort to change these things when I had the chance.

     I remember when I was a child, someone told me as the rain poured from the sky, that it was God's tears for those who no longer listened. As a child I laughed. Now it does not seem so funny it almost seems...."  He stopped talking mid sentence, wiped his tears and looked away.

     The young man could ask no more questions and walked away, thinking of what he had just heard.

     A few months later at the man's funeral where many had gathered to say goodbye, the young man got up and shared the conversation. He than looked to the sky and said "You made a difference in me my friend. I will never be the same. I with the help of those gathered here today will make a difference." He looked back at the crowd who all just looked toward the ground.

"Regrets, sure I have regrets."

Michael Moondance